Have you ever been annoyed when someone next to you chews, drinks, claps their hands, clicks their nails, or makes similar noises? If so, you may have a disorder called misophonia. Actress Melissa Gilbert, known for playing Laura Ingalls on the TV series “Little House on the Prairie,” recently revealed that she has suffered from the condition her whole life.
Misophonia can make everyday sounds make people angry: “When my kids chew gum, eat something, or put their nails on the table, I want to run,” Melissa told People magazine while filming the show.
Melissa said she felt “utterly miserable and terribly guilty” that she had harbored such hatred towards people she loved.
Years later, she learned that the symptoms she was experiencing were due to a neurological disorder called misophonia, in which simple sounds or noises trigger strong emotional, physiological and behavioral responses that are unpleasant for the person experiencing them but difficult to suppress.
Gilbert said she “sobbed” when she discovered the bug had a name and that she was “not just a bad person.”
Gilbert recalled that she was perceived as a loud, rude child, even in front of her family: “I would give hateful glares at my parents, my grandmother and my siblings,” she said.
Guilt in misophonia
The actress says feeling guilt over these reactions is a big part of the disorder: “I felt like I was being rude, and it made me feel really bad. And the guilt that's a big part of misophonia – feeling guilty about the fight-or-flight emotion – it's a really isolating disorder.”
Her children bore the brunt of her disorder, but she never allowed them to eat gum.
Menopause made things worse, she says, as she became more easily annoyed and reacted violently: “As my estrogen started to leak, anger started to seep in and it really started to affect my day-to-day interactions with the people I loved.”
Though she knew about the disorder, she didn't know it was treatable. When she found out about it last year, she contacted the Misophonia Center at Duke University, who responded: “Help is available. You're not alone.”
She underwent 16 weeks of cognitive behavioral therapy, which taught her self-regulation and self-control, and Gilbert says that although her problems haven't gone away, she now knows how to respond when anger rises.
Anamika Singh
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